Welcome to The Soul Minimalist

A fresh introduction, my Substack numbers, and why I'm keeping the paywall

Hi Soul Minimalist!

I’m showing up today with a fresh introduction, some thoughts on my work here, and why I hope you’ll stick around (or join us for the first time!).

In the 18 months since I’ve been writing here on Substack, I’ve only introduced myself on the About Page. So I thought it might be nice, here at the beginning of a new year, to take a moment to say hello, starting with this very close up photo of my face.

In my sunroom office in Greensboro, North Carolina. The wall color is Sherwin Williams Oyster Bay for those who plan to ask.

Hello! We’ll start with a few quick facts you probably know but maybe don’t know:

🏡Mom of 3 mostly grown humans (twins in college, one senior in high school) and they’re all taller than me by a lot.

💕Married for 23 years to John who is an ordained pastor, spiritual director, and relational genius. He also makes dinner for us almost every night.

🎙️Host of The Next Right Thing Podcast with over 27 million downloads which means there are a lot of us who struggle with decision fatigue + chronic hesitation.

📚Author of SIX books (seven if you include the guided journal) and my most recent release, How to Walk into a Room: The Art of Knowing When to Stay and When to Walk Away, which debuted at #6 on The New York Times bestseller list. This is both my most personal and practical book, where I talk about our first-born coming out in 2020, our decision to leave our beloved church, and a discernment framework to hopefully help you with your own “should I stay or should I go?” moments.

🕯️Former sign language interpreter (BS from UNCG) turned spiritual director (MA in Spiritual Formation from Friends University; Spiritual Direction apprenticeship with Anam Cara), which means I’ve been listening for a living for over twenty years.

🍂My color season is Deep Autumn and this knowledge has entirely changed how I shop for clothes. (I used Created Colorful where you can use my affiliate discount code for $20 off. Just enter ‘EPF’ at checkout!)

📣I was named after Emily on The Bob Newhart Show and the P stands for Patrice. My mom taught me how to spell it by saying, “It’s like Pat plus Rice” probably because I insisted it had a “—ch” in it and she was trying to make it right.

📝I’ve been writing here on Substack since July 2023. Here’s why this space matters so much to me.

The soul is the animating center of our choices and our personhood, the invisible place from which we live, move, and discern. But, as important as it is, it’s way too easy to ignore.

I want to help us navigate the landscape of our inner lives, where the terrain can sometimes feel foreign and unruly. Giving space for the care of the soul is where my own heart beats strong. Some of the questions we’ve held here over the last 18 months:

• How can we remain grounded during challenging times?

• How can we incorporate spiritual practice into our lives without the baggage of past trauma?

• How can we move forward when we feel stuck?

This is also where I share more personally about my own life, questions, and walk of faith, including what’s saving my life, the one prayer I always pray for my kids, and the top quotes I saved last year

To become a soul minimalist is not to just ask “What am I holding on to that I no longer need?” but to also consider “What has a hold on me?” As I answer those questions for myself, I’m engaging two primary movements: reflection and practice. Substack is where explore both.

If you’ve been a free subscriber but have thought about upgrading to paid, try it out for a month and see if you like it!

From Zero to Nearly 20,000

At the time of this writing, The Soul Minimalist has nearly 20,000 free subscribers, 2,000 paying subscribers, and 400 who receive the paid content for free through scholarship.

But we started at zero. Here’s how.

In October 2020 we were trying to figure out how best to release our audio reflections and thought maybe Substack could be the answer (Spoiler Alert: It wasn’t, and we eventually made an app instead). But for that reason, I created an account here knowing in the back of my mind I may one day, maybe write in this space.

For two full years, this space sat vacant while I thought about how I might like to show up here. I visited Substack as a reader and subscribed to a handful of writers. But I never wrote here until finally in July 2023, I started even though I didn’t feel ready.

I had an email list already and chose to keep it on FloDesk as it was (I still write my end-of-month letter for that email list every month) which means I started here on Substack at zero subscribers and grew from scratch.

All of that is why my “growth over time” chart looks like this: three years flatlined and then finally, some action in 2023.

While I’ve been writing here for only 18 months, I’ve been writing on the Internet for 20 years if you count Xanga (Do we? Let’s say we do.) Dramatic pause for the realization that it’s been two full human decades.

The growth I’ve had on Substack is not because of the 18 months on Substack, it’s because of the 20 years of writing before I got here. (That bears repeating but I won’t type it again so as to not be annoying.)

On Paying for Content and Why I’m Keeping the Paywall

Something I’ve heard often over the years (not just since offering paid subscriptions here) is this: There are a lot of writers I love but I can’t possibly support/purchase all of their content.

To that I say this: OF COURSE YOU CAN’T.

What a great opportunity to practice digital (and soul) minimalism. As The Lazy Genius reminds us: Decide what matters to you. (And not everything can matter at the same time.)

We make choices all the time about who we will listen to, support, champion, learn from, and be entertained by. You do it, I do it, we all do it all the time. When content is free, it’s easier to pay casual attention. But this can also inadverntatly add to our decision fatigue.

If you want free content from me, I have it everywhere.

• 15 years of free blog posts

• 350 free episodes on The Next Right Thing podcast (including transcripts!)

• This conversation with Hota Kotb on The Today Show

• As a guest with friends and colleagues like Kendra Adachi, John Mark Comer, Annie F. Downs, Suzanne Stabile, Knox McCoy and Jamie B. Golden, and many more that you’ll never have time to listen to but if you wanted to you could

You’re already overwhelmed, aren’t you? That’s what “free” can do to us. When we have so many options, it’s easier not to pick any of them. I’m so grateful to be able to easily offer paid subscriptions here for three main reasons:

1. I love this work and I want to do it for a very long time. Guess what they call work you don’t get paid for? It’s called “volunteering” and that does not pay the heat bill, unfortunately.

2. It feels small in a world of big. While the Internet is a place vast enough to find our people, it’s way too vast to hang out in. Substack feels like the Internet but not the Internet. The paywall keeps it smaller on purpose.

3. Sometimes I want to say things to people who I know are interested to hear it. Many writers say the same thing about the paywall on Substack because it’s true: it gives us a level of protection against drive-by comments. After twenty years writing on the Internet for free, I’m tired. Anyone can slide into my DMs, send me an email, or leave reviews on my books and podcast. It’s nice to have one place online where, if you want to read all my posts here or make comments on them, you have to be a paying subscriber.

Of course, like most writers here, I never want to exclude someone who wants to be here, which is why we offer free subscriptions for one year to anyone who asks. (More about how on my about page.)

If you want to test things before you subscribe, here are my Top Free Posts:

• Find a Morning Rhythm You Can Hold On To: And one that can hold onto you

• Confessions From the Last Week: For when you feel like quitting

• What’s Saving My Life: The shoes, the journals, the books, and the hope

If you want to join at the monthly, annual, or founders level, you’ll get instant access to my Top Paid Posts:

• The Eight Word Prayer I Keep Repeating: And what (almost) always happens next

• 12 Words That Could Change Everything: From politics to vocation, this simple advice is making a difference

• Let’s Call it a Summer of Healing: On comfort, addiction, and participating in my own renewal

You’ll also get access to our Soul Minimalists Only Workshop called How to Find and Follow Arrows as well as an invitation to join our private Instagram account (if you’re a paying subscriber, check your welcome email for the link!) where I share behind-the-scenes things and a question of the day.

A peek inside our private Instagram account.

So there it is, my friends. If you’re one of the nearly 20,000 readers who read for free, I’m glad you’re here and you’ll continue to receive at least one full free post per month (this month you’re getting two!)

But if my work has been meaningful to you at all and you would like to support it (even for just one month), it would mean a lot to me and I hope a lot to you as well.

As always, I’m glad you’re here;

epf